I will give you, stay-at-home moms, 8 reasons not to feel guilty for raising your children. Instead, you can enjoy your time with them. Now…
I’m sure you have, too, met another person who asked you what you are doing for a living?
Answer: I’m a stay-at-home mom.
Person: “What are you doing all day?” Or “oh a stay-at-home mom!” “Or, so you don’t have a job?”
Does this conversation seem familiar?
That doesn’t feel very good on your self-esteem, does it?
But being a stay-at-home mom is such a wonderful job. (Some people would even argue it’s not a job…)
I’m telling you that you are one lucky mom. Don’t listen to them! And here is why:
1. Stay-at-home moms get to raise their children
Your family is truly blessed that your significant other makes enough money for you to stay at home with the kids. Let’s face it, nobody –well, maybe your mom ;)- can better raise your children than you can. Especially in the first few years of your children’s lives, they need you and you need them.
Being a working mom is hard and they always have to divide their attention between their job and family. No, I’m not saying it cannot be done, but as the majority of working moms told me it’s incredibly hard. They all suffer from mom guilt because they feel like they are not there enough for their children. I’m still glad so many incredible moms get to go out there and show the world what we women have to offer. Keep it up, ladies! I, for one, will join you one day again…
2. Stay-at-home moms get to teach their children
Foreign moms have to offer things that other moms don’t have. What things am I talking about you wonder?
Your first language!
Who could better teach your children your first language than you? -Yea, Yea, maybe your mom- But seriously, you can! Nobody else would make it their mission just as much as you would. Believe me, when they do understand/speak your first language you will be so proud!! Teaching them is a lot of work, but so worth it. Check out my bilingual activities.
I’m sure it’s crucial for you to teach your children about your culture. What is your home country like? You want them to hear from you… It’s your country after all. Planning trips back home with your children is everything. This will bring you so much joy.
So many wonderful foreign moms that I know have specific skills and they are planning to teach them to their children. Some are very crafty such as sewing or crocheting, while others are great cooks. There is no feeling like creating a “mini-me.” I love to clean my house and to cook healthy. Guess what? My daughter loves these things, too. She is currently cleaning her scooter while I’m working on this article. Win! She also already knows how to make traditional German food. Awesome!
3. Stay-at-home moms get to be a part of their children’s lives
This part is the hardest one to admit…
You only have a few years with them
You only have 5 short years with them until they go off to school all day. I know some days seem longer than others, but the years go by quickly! Isn’t that the truth? You get to go up every morning and get to spend the day with your children. How great is that? No rush hour, no annoying meeting, and no challenging clients…
You get to be present
But more importantly, you truly get to be part of your children’s lives. You get to meet the kids and other parents they hang out with. And you get to make new friends in the process. This is a win-win situation.
Also, you get to see them during activities. I enjoy that part because if they struggle with something, I can focus on that at home. But, you also get to be super proud of them when they do something well. My oldest enjoys gymnastics and she’s good at it. I love taking her and I’m so proud that she always gives her very best, even at such a young age.
5. Stay-at-home moms get to support their families in any way
You get to be in charge. I know it’s not always easy, but you get to be the boss –well, next to your toddler I guess-. 😉 You can make it your mission to cook healthy, make sure everyone exercises enough and lives a healthy lifestyle.
You save the family some needed vacation time
More (or equally) importantly, you can free up your significant other from needing to take off work, especially while the kids are sick. More PTO for vacations. Yay! And you get to nurse your family back to health. Believe me, you don’t want to be far away when your kiddos are sick.
Logistics are much simpler thanks to you
Let’s be honest, being at home with the kids is just easier than having two parents work. This is logistically so much more doable. You don’t have to rush in the morning to get everyone ready. No, worrying if one is home late for work. You don’t have to find childcare, drivers, etc. No, taking time off for school events. The list goes on…
6. Stay-at-home moms get to financially support their family (in a non-traditional way)
Wait a minute you think… I’m not working!
You get to be creative
Well, you don’t have an income, but you still help out with the finances. I’m sure you are in charge of the grocery budget or you and your significant other sets a budget together. You make sure every week that you stay within the budge and even find extra deals to save your family some money. How is that for helping out with the finances? Most families I talked to spend less money since one parent is at home compared to when both parents are working. Finding great deals is a lot of work and takes some serious commitment. You are helping your family’s finances!! Bravo!
Kick those bills in the behind
Also, a lot of moms I talked to reported that they help out to lower bills by calling insurance companies and others to find lower rates. I sure made it my mission to lower our internet/TV bill. We are saving so much money a year now, it’s incredible.
7. Stay-at-home moms are enough
I’m sure your family is grateful to have you and notices –at least ones in a while- what you are giving up for them. But always remember this is such a short phase in your life, even though it seems like forever some days. You get to be happy and to enjoy your time with your children. Don’t let others, even yourself, talk you down. You are everything your family needs! And much more.
8. Stay-at-home moms will come back stronger than ever
I remember telling my husband -back then when I entertained the same thoughts- that I was worried I wouldn’t get back into a career. You know what he told me?? He said, you made it over here, got a job, went to University -in another language-, and got a great job afterward. You can do anything you want!
You can do anything you set your mind to
OMG mind-blowing, right? Yes, he’s right and I know you can do it, too. You know why because people like you and I don’t let others stop us. I’m not saying it will be easy I’m saying we will work our way up or straight forwards -whatever your goal is- again. I’m telling you we can do this. Motherhood, especially as a foreign mom, makes us even stronger. And you don’t need a college degree… All you need is motivation!
So, shake off the guilt and enjoy your time with your kids as a stay-at-home mom. I know what you are worth, your family knows what you are worth, and now you do, too.